When I entered high school I was a fish out of water. I stood 6’1″ and weighed only ninety-nine pounds. I was teased endlessly for being so skinny. I felt initimidated by other guys my own age. They were bigger, weighed much more, and some had full beards. During gymn class I just wanted to climb into a locker and hide. I just wasn’t comfortable in my own skin.
This feeling followed me for most of my life. I did not follow in my father’s foot steps and he liked to make me feel small for it. I chose to go to a high school that was pure academic, no trade classes. I also worked on my piano skills so that I could follow a calling of singing and playing Gospel music.
Finally, after going through stays in the mental health ward I began to see myself differently. My body had not changed much, I was still tall and skinny but I began to shed the taunts and teasing about my body. I was learning to be comfortable in my own skin causing me to feel more relaxed around others. I was no longer trying to gain acceptance by my peers.
It is amazing how my brain began to change of how I looked when I saw my reflection in a mirror. My outlook took a dramatic turn. I am no longer tall and skinny, but I have lost some height, just part of aging, and also have gain much weight due to a year of inmobility.
My acceptance of being bi-polar has also helped my comfortability of myself.
I am now comfortable in my own skin!