“The intention to live as long as possible isn’t one of the mind’s best intentions, because quantity isn’t the same as quality.” ~ Deepak Chopra

I have been having this debate in my mind for years. I have asked myself about the affects that meds I take are worth it. For instance, the sleeping pill, it works, but it is how I feel the next day is what frustrates me. It feels like a hangover. I have never been one that when I wake up to be up and at it. For me, waking up is a slow process. I need time. If I have an appointment for 9 a.m., I set the alarm for 6 a.m.. My best friend feels that is way too early. He’s the kind of guy the moment his eyes open he is ready to tackle the day.

I argue there must be a middle of this arguement, some place where one can have quality and quantity. You can have quantity, but your life is one big pain, you must ask yourself, is it really worth it?

Then there’s the fantasy people muse, “if I only had money, I would be happy”. This blogger has met many who have money, but their life isn’t full and vibrant. Oh yes, they have that nice 3 floor brownstone and the finest of everything in the home. Yet, you spend time with them and the home lacks warmth, there is no laughter coming from the children’s room. Not much romance between the couple. Many stay together for the children, while others only see the benefit of staying together because of the financial gains that are to be had.

I made good money when I was younger, but I squandered it on things that were considered frivolous. I truly have nothing to show for those days. I didn’t save for a rainy day. I was young, and probably like most young people, I felt invincilbe, that the good money would always be there. That my body would never consider betraying me.

I am now at the point in my life to where it is stable, I feel stable, not so much physically, but mostly mentally stable. I live on a fixed income, but I don’t go hungry, sleep in a good bed, have a roof over my head, and probably a comfortable place of living.

Oh, I argue with myself which is worse, the medications or the side affects. Sometimes, I decide it’s the side affects. Some numb your mind, your moving, but in reality, you are just going through the motions. Days seem to melt into the next day, and the week passes quickly and you are alarmed that the weekend has again arrived. I look back and ask, what did I accomplish this past week? Answer, sweet nothing!

Then there are the medications that mess with your cycle when it comes to your bowels. With some, you need laxatives readily available. For others you better stick close to the commode….lol

Yes, I mention these things to my doctor and most of the time he will tell me, it takes time for your body to adjust. The other times, we move on to something new. I look at my side table at the end of my sofa and at times feel like it looks like a pharmacy. I have them arranged so I know which ones I have to take in the morning, the afternoon, and the ones before bed.

I take Warfarin, a blood thinner, to keep me from developing dvt clots. My skin however, is every shade of black, blue and red. Then there is the monthly trip to the lab for blood work to see how my level of INR is. If they find a vein, good, but my veins are scarred. So, every once in a while, they give me a poke, it starts, but for unknown reason the vein quits. Which means, try the other arm! I feel like a pin cushion some days.

So dear reader, if you had to choose, quality or quantity, which would it be? Or would you hope that you could find a sweet spot that would allow to have some of both?

I and the other readers would like to hear from you! Leave your thoughts using the comment sections below.